animalmom
Herd Master
Sorry, you are still replying in complete coherent sentences so she won't be kidding any time soon.
Check out the "doe code"
The Kidding Doe's Code of Honor
1. No kid shall be born until total chaos has been reached by all
involved. Your owner's house must be a wreck, their family hungry,
and desperate for clean clothes, and their social life nonexistent.
2. "Midwives" must reach the babbling fool status before you kid out.
Bloodshot eyes, tangled hair and the inability to form a sentence
means the time is getting close.
3. For every bell, beeper, camera, or whistle they attach to you,
kidding must be delayed by at least one day for each item. If they
use an audio monitor, one good yell per hour will keep things interesting.
4. If you hear the words, "She's no where near ready. She'll be fine
while we're away for the weekend." Wait until they load the car, and
then begin pushing!
5. Owner stress must be at an all time high! If you are in the care
of someone else, ten to fifteen phone calls a day is a sign you're
getting close.
6. When you hear the words, "I can't take it anymore!" wait at least
three more days.
7. You must keep this waiting game interesting. False alarms are
mandatory! Little teasers such as looking at your stomach, pushing
your food around, and then walking away from it, and nesting are
always good for a rise.
8. The honor of all goats is now in your hands. Use this time to
avenge all of your barn mates. Think about your friend who had to
wear that silly costume in front of those people. Hang onto that baby
for another day. Oh, they made him do tricks too! Three more days
seems fair. Late feedings, the dreaded diet, bad haircuts, those
awful wormings can also be avenged at this time.
9. If you have fulfilled all of the above and are still not sure when
to have the kids, listen to the weather forecast on the radio that
has been so generously provided by those who wait. Severe Storm
warning is what you're waiting for. In the heart of the storm jump
into action! You have a good chance of those who wait missing the
whole thing while searching for a flashlight that works!
10. Make the most of your interrupted nights. Beg for food each time
someone comes into the barn to check you. Your barn mates will love
you as the extra goodies fall their way too. Remember this code of
honor was designed to remind man of how truly special goats are. Do
your best to reward those who wait with a beautiful doeling to carry
on the Doe Code of Honor for the next generation of those who wait.
Check out the "doe code"
The Kidding Doe's Code of Honor
1. No kid shall be born until total chaos has been reached by all
involved. Your owner's house must be a wreck, their family hungry,
and desperate for clean clothes, and their social life nonexistent.
2. "Midwives" must reach the babbling fool status before you kid out.
Bloodshot eyes, tangled hair and the inability to form a sentence
means the time is getting close.
3. For every bell, beeper, camera, or whistle they attach to you,
kidding must be delayed by at least one day for each item. If they
use an audio monitor, one good yell per hour will keep things interesting.
4. If you hear the words, "She's no where near ready. She'll be fine
while we're away for the weekend." Wait until they load the car, and
then begin pushing!
5. Owner stress must be at an all time high! If you are in the care
of someone else, ten to fifteen phone calls a day is a sign you're
getting close.
6. When you hear the words, "I can't take it anymore!" wait at least
three more days.
7. You must keep this waiting game interesting. False alarms are
mandatory! Little teasers such as looking at your stomach, pushing
your food around, and then walking away from it, and nesting are
always good for a rise.
8. The honor of all goats is now in your hands. Use this time to
avenge all of your barn mates. Think about your friend who had to
wear that silly costume in front of those people. Hang onto that baby
for another day. Oh, they made him do tricks too! Three more days
seems fair. Late feedings, the dreaded diet, bad haircuts, those
awful wormings can also be avenged at this time.
9. If you have fulfilled all of the above and are still not sure when
to have the kids, listen to the weather forecast on the radio that
has been so generously provided by those who wait. Severe Storm
warning is what you're waiting for. In the heart of the storm jump
into action! You have a good chance of those who wait missing the
whole thing while searching for a flashlight that works!
10. Make the most of your interrupted nights. Beg for food each time
someone comes into the barn to check you. Your barn mates will love
you as the extra goodies fall their way too. Remember this code of
honor was designed to remind man of how truly special goats are. Do
your best to reward those who wait with a beautiful doeling to carry
on the Doe Code of Honor for the next generation of those who wait.
she’s probably going to get a plain cake, no bells and whistles and hrs of work. Hopefully it doesn’t have a pinch of goat hair in it
