Baymule’s Journal

[Baymule]

I worked all day on the chicken tractor yesterday. It takes me awhile to figure out what’s next. I know what I want the finished product to do, just don’t know how to get there and have to muddle along. I actually started 2 years ago and got the frame together, then BJ died and my world went to pieces.

The frame I started with.

Hardware cloth on 2 sides and tin across the back. Top pieces laid on top.

I carefully measured and marked where holes needed to go. I laid the tin on the porch, put a 1x4 under it and pounded a nail through it. I used aluminum wire to “tie” the tin on the frame.

Because I don’t like snagged myself on wire ends, I use pliers to bend the ends in “dog ears”.

The top tin is on, one side lifts up, the other side is wired to the frame.

I put a gate on one end for convenience. Today I will put tin on it and a latch to keep it closed.

It won’t hold all the Dirty Birdies, but it will get at least half off the porch. I have the pieces cut and the fittings for a second one, but won’t build it, I wouldn’t get it finished in time before these birds go to freezer camp. I’ll rig them up a pen so I can get them off the porch.

 

[Baymule]

Chicken tractor is finished and Dirty Birdies are off the porch. I put ALL of them in the new chicken tractor. I was a mess when that chore was done. Talk about sh!t at and hot! Those birds have good aim! I cleaned up most of the mess, have feeders soaking in a bucket and water in the big tubs, but mostly all clean. The gross stuff anyway. I just got out of the shower. I had to clean up ME! Dirty Birdies are happy, I’m happy, porch is no longer a chicken poop sanctuary.

 

[Ridgetop]

Looking good. I know that you open the top to do chores with birds and possibly for more air flow, but won't cats or something get the birds when it is left open? Or is is only open for a view of the birsd?

 

[SageHill]

I heard the dirty birdies just peeped they want an annex.
Actually, it looks GREAT.

 

[Baymule]

Looking good. I know that you open the top to do chores with birds and possibly for more air flow, but won't cats or something get the birds when it is left open? Or is is only open for a view of the birsd?

I can open the top, but it stays closed. I can open the end gate for feed and water.

 

[Baymule]

RANT!!!

So I ran over a squirrel a couple days ago. No biggie, right? I mean, other than feeling bad for the squirrel.

Then my car started making this terrible noise at 55-60 MPH. Sounded like the front end was falling out of it! I called the Hyundai dealership and threw myself at the mercy of the service department. I was there at 7:30 this morning so they could squeeze me in, to look at my car.

Junior, the service guy looked at the car. Driving it had shifted the cracked bumper to a full fledged break, maybe 8” long. The plastic covering in the front of the undercarriage was destroyed. New bumper! New plastic thingy! But they don’t have a body shop, bumpers come in unpainted and I would have to take it to a body shop to get it painted.

I became a raving lunatic. A SQUIRREL!! A STUPID SQUIRREL! A FREAKING SQUIRREL CAUSED ALL THIS DAMAGE????? Junior was very polite, we had a good laugh over it. He recommended the body shop next door. Uhhhhh…. NOPE!

So I go to my favorite body shop, used by my son, sister-in-law and her parents when they were alive. Yeah, it’s a family tradition. I showed it to Johnny and told him what Junior said about a new bumper.

Me-I’m not that stupid. I know you can patch that thing up with a fiberglass repair kit and nobody would ever know.

Johnny-Yeah, we can fix that up.

Johnny-Cash or insurance?

Me-depends on the cost.

Meanwhile I’m ranting and raving about the squirrel. I was having a Baymule Temper Tantrum. I could have stomped squirrels to death with my bare feet at that point.

I hit a deer last month in my truck! You know what it did to my truck?? NOTHING!! My truck just laughed at the deer and said, “STOOPID DUMBA$$ DEER! And rolled over it and went on down the road. Yes! THATS how it’s done!

My car? Oh hell no!! It has to sustain major damage over a suicidal Kamakazie FREAKING STUPID SQUIRREL!! A SQUIRREL! What would an armadillo do to it? Total my car??

I’m driving a recycled grocery bag! Ok, a LOT of recycled grocery bags! Gheesh! A roller skate made out of PLASTIC that can’t even run over a DAMNED, FREAKING SQUIRREL!! One measly little SQUIRREL!! 2or3 of the little ba$tards probably would’ve flipped the car and sent it rolling down the road , end over end, hit another SQUIRREL and sent it airborne to the top of a pine tree!

SQUIRRELS! I HATE SQUIRRELS!

Me-How much for a half inch thick steel skid plate? Could you fix me up? I might hit another SQUIRREL and want to be prepared!

Johnny-Laughed and handed me a quote, cash price. For ordering the plastic undercarriage (not even the length of the car, just the little strip up front) and fiberglassing and painting the bumper…..

$647.86

See why I love this place? That’s not even worth turning into the insurance. It won’t go on Carfax, it will never show up as a wrecked car, lowering the value, all because of a STUPID IDIOT SQUIRREL! Hey SQUIRREL! I’m glad you are DEAD! BWA-HA-HA-HA!!

I asked Johnny if he had some duct tape because I had somewhere to go this weekend and didn’t want that awful racket the whole trip. Johnny didn’t want to duct tape it because the glue would stick to the paint, making more work for them. He got zip ties and a drill.

Me-couldn’t we just take that thing off?

Johnny-no. It attaches to the front fenders, without it, the wind from driving it would collapse the fenders.

Me-yeah-bad idea. I like zip ties. I HATE SQUIRRELS!

I take it in Monday, pick it up Tuesday.


Did I mention how much I HATE STUPID SUICIDAL KAMAKAZIE FREAKING SQUIRRELS??

 

[Bruce]

There HAS to be something else! A 1 pound squirrel couldn't have caused that kind of damage. Who borrowed the car in the past? What deep rut roads have been travelled?

 

[Ridgetop]

Johnny-no. It attaches to the front fenders, without it, the wind from driving it would collapse the fenders.

The wind would collapse the fenders without the bumper?!
Are you sure that a squirrel did that? Maybe there was a flaw in the bumper to begin with.

 

[Baymule]

Nobody has borrowed the car. I haven’t driven it in deep ruts.
Yes. A squirrel did that. Traveling at 60 MPH, hit the squirrel that was probably headed home after going diving in a pond and ingesting lead fishing weights, combined to give my plastic roller skate quite a whallop. The plastic undercarriage piece is very thin, the wind caught it and broke off the fasteners. The bumper? Cracked.

I’m just glad that I’m sensible enough to not roll over and take what the dealership says as my only option.

It was the squirrel.

 

[Ridgetop]

Me-How much for a half inch thick steel skid plate? Could you fix me up? I might hit another SQUIRREL and want to be prepared!

But your plastic bag car would no longer go 60 mph with a half inch thick steel plate on it - too heavy. Maybe it would even tip the car nose first into the road!

What about one of those sonic things they sell to scare off squirrels and rodents? You could zip tie it to the front bumper.

We share your hatred and loathing for squirrels.