# Great diet!



## Farmer Kitty (Jul 11, 2009)

The Purina Diet--JOKE                                                             

Yesterday I was buying 2 large bags of Purina dog chow at Wal-Mart, for my 
dogs: Winston, Chief, Gus, and Maximus. I was about to check out when a    
woman behind me asked if I had a dog. What did she think that I had an     
elephant?                                                                  
Since I had little else to do, on impulse, I told her that no, I did not   
have a dog, and that I was starting the Purina Diet again, although I      
probably should not because I ended up in the hospital last time. On the   
bright side though, I had lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive 
care ward with tubes coming out of every hole in my body and IVs in both   
arms. I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that the way   
that it works is to load your pockets with Purina nuggets and simply eat   
one                                                                        
or two every time you feel hungry and that the food is nutritionally       
complete so I was going to try it again. (I have to mention here that      
practically everyone in the line was enthralled with my story by now)..    
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care because the dog food  
had poisoned me. I told her no; I had stopped in the middle of the parking 
lot to lick my butt and a car hit me. I thought the guy behind her was     
going                                                                   
to have a heart attack, he was laughing so hard! WAL-MART won't let me     
shop                                                                       
there anymore.


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## wynedot55 (Jul 11, 2009)




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## Thewife (Jul 11, 2009)

That's a good one!


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## ohiofarmgirl (Jul 11, 2009)

that is hilarious! good for you!!!

when i shop i get 'how old is your baby' and i just look at them and say i dont have a baby. in my cart is:

* baby wipes for the dairy goat
* baby food for the 19 year old cat

hee hee hee its too much to explain or regular people...


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## Farmer Kitty (Jul 11, 2009)

ohiofarmgirl said:
			
		

> that is hilarious! good for you!!!
> 
> when i shop i get 'how old is your baby' and i just look at them and say i dont have a baby. in my cart is:
> 
> ...


It's a joke sent to me via email. 

I understand the baby items in the cart for pets/animals. I to have been there and done that many a time!


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## username taken (Jul 12, 2009)

now just imagine me, 21 yrs old but looking like I'm about 16, buying a home pregnancy test because we were curious to see if it would work for preg testing goats 

Oh, and did I forget the condoms for covering the ultrasound probe (they work really well  )


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## Farmer Kitty (Jul 12, 2009)

username taken said:
			
		

> now just imagine me, 21 yrs old but looking like I'm about 16, buying a home pregnancy test because we were curious to see if it would work for preg testing goats
> 
> Oh, and did I forget the condoms for covering the ultrasound probe (they work really well  )


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## username taken (Jul 14, 2009)

in case anyone was wondering the home pregnancy test didnt work on the goaties ... but we did look like idiots walking round behind them catching urine


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## Farmer Kitty (Jul 14, 2009)

username taken said:
			
		

> in case anyone was wondering the home pregnancy test didnt work on the goaties ... but we did look like idiots walking round behind them catching urine


What a visual that makes!


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## GrassFarmerGalloway (Jul 21, 2009)

This kind of reminds me of the 'here's your sign' jokes!


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## Kute Kitten (Jul 21, 2009)




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## OSUman (Jul 21, 2009)

but why would you get kicked out of Wal- Mart????


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## m.holloway (Jul 21, 2009)

well, I sure have been missing alot around here. See what I get for loofing!!!! LOL I can see ya now in line framer kitty.


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## Farmer Kitty (Jul 21, 2009)

OSUman said:
			
		

> but why would you get kicked out of Wal- Mart????


It's a joke.


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## m.holloway (Jul 21, 2009)

are you sure???????? with you guys it might just be true!!!!


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## Iwantgoats (Apr 29, 2010)

that is so funny.


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