# Getting husband and kids onboard



## Gclover (Apr 6, 2016)

Hello, I just joined, I have been reading the backyard forums for quite a while. Tons of helpful information. 

So long story short, after moving from the city And buying 2 acres I am not allowed farm animals. I had plans on starting out with chickens, goats, and bees. That can't happen until I find different property. I was having a conversation with my husband about it and he actually threw out the meat rabbit idea. I felt dumb for not even thinking about it. Rabbits are not considered farm animals. So I have been doing a ton of research and planning everything out. We have never had rabbit meat. So I found someone close that sells the meat, it will be ready in a week. 

Now that the plan is becoming more of a reality my husband is against the idea of raising any animals for meat. That was always part of my plan And he knew that was always going to be part of it. He thinks it will traumatize our kids. My youngest is 2 and my oldest is 11. I of course worry about how my 11 yr old will handle this also but I don't feel like it will ruin her childhood. 

So, did anyone else have issues with getting their spouse and kids to go along with meat rabbits? How did you handle talking to your kids about it? 

Thanks for taking the time to read all of that and for any advice you might have!


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## babsbag (Apr 6, 2016)

I never had to persuade my husband as he grew up eating home grown animals and the kids were grown and gone when we started this farming life. But I will say that many many a child grows up on a farm and even raises animals for sale for food. Look at all the kids in 4H and FFA that raise sheep, goats, steers, chickens, pigs, etc and then take them to auction, parade them around the ring, and sell them; they are certainly not traumatized.  There is some very good lessons to be learned by raising an animal, caring for it, treating it humanely, and then butchering it for food if that is its purpose. For me, I don't name my food, but same people do. I have a certain detachment to that animal right from the start if that is its destiny, but that doesn't mean I treat it poorly.

I think your 11 year old is old enough to understand that food does not come from the meat case at the local market, it was all a live animal at some point. Talk to them, explain it to them, make them a part of the process. That doesn't mean they have to see the deed being done but they need to know how and why it is being done. You have a wonderful chance to teach them some life lessons.

Sometimes you will have a breeder animal, like your rabbits, or maybe a goat. Let your child bond with those animals, but make sure they know why you are raising the offspring.

Can't help on the husband front, good luck with that one.


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## samssimonsays (Apr 6, 2016)

It honestly depends on HOW you do it. I have a friend that ate dinner with her family then went to do chores only to find all of her rabbits but one were missing. When she ran to her mom about it her mom simply said that is what they had just eaten. She was forever traumatized of this and is now a vegetarian. 

I believe this is how it went, either way the animals was served as dinner: Another friend was given a calf to raise and care for at age 7. NO talk of raising it for food. She worked super hard for 4-h and trained it. Spent a lot of time with it. Then her dad handed her the gun to kill it. said it was part of raising animals. She still doesn't care for beef. 

If you get the animals with the intent to love on the breeding animals but stay disconnected from the babies who will be meat pen, things go smoother. Make sure you make the intent on the rabbits clear and that any babies will be for eating but they can name and enjoy the adults all they want. I have a friend who has lops for their kids to raise that are not eaten and then they have meat rabbits that are. They show both but the kids can get attached to the lops all they want, just not the meat.


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## Pamela (Apr 6, 2016)

Ouch! Some of those parenting methods are harsh! The first time we got pigs our girls were 2,3 and 5. We named the pigs ham and bacon. The girls caught on quickly that they were for our table. We have had animals that we've gotten attached to, mostly bottle calves.  However, I maintain that once you and the kids have had to chase them down and pen them up again a few times, they become much easier to eat.


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## Baymule (Apr 6, 2016)

MY grand daughter and I got 20 straight run chicks when she was 5. I told her from the start that any roosters were going to be dinner. We lived in town at the time and I told her crowing roosters would disturb the neighborhood. My mantra was, you crow-off with your head! She even repeated it. One day she asked if we could cut a rooster's head off. I asked her if she would eat it, she said yes. I told her there would be blood, she said ok. We caught a rooster and fashioned a killing cone from cardboard. I explained to her that it was the most humane way to kill a chicken, no flopping around, no running crazy, just snugly held while it bled out. We held hands and prayed for the rooster after I cut his throat. We thanked the rooster for giving up his life so that we could eat. We thanked God for providing us with good food. She watched me clean it and helped cut it up for supper. No, she was not traumatized at all. Her favorite is my home canned chicken broth.


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## samssimonsays (Apr 6, 2016)

Baymule said:


> MY grand daughter and I got 20 straight run chicks when she was 5. I told her from the start that any roosters were going to be dinner. We lived in town at the time and I told her crowing roosters would disturb the neighborhood. My mantra was, you crow-off with your head! She even repeated it. One day she asked if we could cut a rooster's head off. I asked her if she would eat it, she said yes. I told her there would be blood, she said ok. We caught a rooster and fashioned a killing cone from cardboard. I explained to her that it was the most humane way to kill a chicken, no flopping around, no running crazy, just snugly held while it bled out. We held hands and prayed for the rooster after I cut his throat. We thanked the rooster for giving up his life so that we could eat. We thanked God for providing us with good food. She watched me clean it and helped cut it up for supper. No, she was not traumatized at all. Her favorite is my home canned chicken broth.


I LOVE this.


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## frustratedearthmother (Apr 6, 2016)

Did the same with my grandkids and some quail.  They wanted to see it, so they had to promise to eat it.  We had our prayer, thanked the quail for his sacrifice and proceeded with the deed.  Cooked 'em up and they literally wanted to go kill more!


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## TAH (Apr 6, 2016)

Us kids were not happy with butchering animals for meat at first. We would have conversations about where our meat comes from, and then the question would come, how is it different from us butchering a animal for us to eat, then getting it from the store, it wasn't different it is the same. You should get some meat chickens and butcher those before getting something they are attached to. Turn it into a science experiment, By asking them all the parts of the chicken and show them it is no big deal. It was so much fun looking at all the different parts of the animal and learning how they work and what they are used for.


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## Latestarter (Apr 6, 2016)

Greetings @Gclover from the front range in Colorado  Welcome to BYH. Glad you finally joined and jumped into the discussion ring  Very good subject as well. Lots of feelings about it from many folks. Hope you can come to terms with the significant other as well as the kids. Unfortunately, I can add nothing to the discussion as all my kids were/are grown and gone before I got into domesticated meat animals. They were however raised on venison for most of their young lives and loved it. They knew where it came from and actually they helped butcher deer carcasses with me for the freezer.  Congrats on moving to your 2 acres, sorry "farm animals" aren't allowed.


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## Gclover (Apr 6, 2016)

Thank you all so much! I feel way better about my thought process now. Haha. Basically everything that was said is what I have been telling my husband. He has more of the mind that ignorance is bliss. I'm very much the opposite. Especially when it comes to an animal dying for my benefit. I think the butchering process will be incredibly hard, but I will feel better knowing that animal had a good life and was well Fed and healthy. Also, as mentioned, I think learning to be self sufficient is an incredibly important life skill. Something I wish I was taught when I was younger.

I don't know a ton about 4h, I did not realize they had animal projects for food. Maybe this is something I can look into for my daughter. Do many of you guys have your kids involved in 4h?

I'm not sure having her help in the processing right away would work. Even as a science experiment, she is pretty squeamish. I will definitely wait for her to be ready to be involved on that part. I would definitely never do it any of the ways Melissa drawz mentioned!! That would traumatize me! Haha. 

Thanks latesarter! I should have checked the zoning first but there is a cow farm a couple blocks away, and I was allowed chickens, goats, and bees in the city!! I didn't think it wouldn't be allowed. Lol.


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## TAH (Apr 6, 2016)

4-H would probably be a great way to getting her involved with not getting attached to the animals.


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## Pastor Dave (Apr 8, 2016)

Welcome from Indiana!
It is definitely true that rabbits have never been classified as an agricultural class of animal. This 
allows a loop hole for most locations not allowing agricultural animals to be raised.
My wife was not raised on a farm, but her dad hunts and fishes. When we were still engaged or newly weds I went out behind her mom and dad's and hunted some squirrels she ended up sitting to eat with me. As I cleaned them, she said it seemed like quite a waste considering the size of the carcass. I told her that was why I had shot 4 of them. Some guys occasionally brought a deer to me to process. So, she wasn't squeamish, but did have the "cute bunny" syndrome.

She knew I had raised them with my family as a kid, so she didn't question my abilities. My boys were 2 and 5 when I started back up. The 2 yr old was only eating eating chicken nuggets at the time, so occasionally I would take the back straps and turn it into nuggets so he would eat them. He knows there are rabbits out in the shed, and he "knows" we eat them. At least he hears us discuss it.

My 5 yr old was all into all aspects of the production. He likes to help feed, plays with the babies, pets the adults, and has asked to watch the dispatching of the fryers. I still have not let him see that part yet. I also told him we do not name the babies, and as often as the ones he has seen raised are processed, there will be new litters to replace them to play with. He is ok with that.

Both my wife and older son ate with me the very first time and liked the meat to their surprise. I am a pretty good cook and taught my wife how to cook, but she would cook the meat if I wasn't so picky. She does not want to think about the phase between running around on foot and in the freezer. I bring then into the kitchen ready to be aged in the fridge for 24 hours and quartered cut up. We have almost eliminated buying pork and chicken at the store, and we know no steroids or antibiotics or anything else that could be introduced to commercial herds.

I am not familiar with raising daughters, but you might let her know how healthy the meat is. It is very low in fat or cholesterol content, and high in protein. If she is willing to try it, she will not need to fear weight gain (depending on cooking method). There are several cooking methods that are lean as well. Any way one can cook chicken, can substitute in rabbit. The good smells coming from the kitchen might help in creating an appetite for rabbit. Imagine a slightly sweet chicken that is coarser like pork. This could also bring hubbie around the very first time the effort has paid off with a good meal and less grocery bills.

It is a mind over matter thing. They look a little less cute when one has to clean up after the rabbits and dispose of the waste in whatever manner is chosen. Some chores to feed and clean after them will probably help some reality set in without being harsh. Many kids have grown up knowing the livestock is meat without being involved in butchering time. Witnessing the humane method of dispatching and then helping in processing can teach some good lessons in appreciating where food comes from and not to waste something that has value.

Hope this helps some.


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## samssimonsays (Apr 8, 2016)

I had a friend living on 40 acres that used to be a farm (for generations in the family) and when he went to apply fr a build permit for a barn they flagged him and said he was no longer zoned that way. He was able to go to city council meetings to request to be rezoned. They did. But they can also grant you an allotted number of animals per your property that you cannot exceed as well which may be an option. I would check about maybe trying one of those options.


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