# Something that's starting to bug me....



## glenolam

Sorry - I just need to vent for a minute.

You ever get tired of hearing "WOW.  You sure have a farm here - it must be hard working full time and taking care of all these animals.  Don't you have any time for yourself?  I don't know how you do it...." and it's coming from the _same people/person_ each time?  

How many times can I say "Yes, I know we have a small farm.  Yes, it is a lot of work and my 'me' time is spent enjoying my farm.  I do it because I have fun and, to me, it's better than sitting at the beach doing nothing".

I mean, I know to most people it looks like we live a crazy and hectic life, but if we've already had the conversation about WHY we have a farm and how much work it is, why keep bringing it up?

I don't repeatedly say "Wow - you're doing nothing today but sitting by the pool day dreaming?  That must be really crazy!  I don't know how you don't drive yourself insane with all the free time you have!"

Seems like some people would rather be busy 24/7 (like me) and some couldn't fathom waking up thinking what _else_ has to get done today.  But at least I don't point out that difference EVERY TIME we have a conversation!  Different strokes, I guess....


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## DonnaBelle

Oh Boy, can I relate.

We were building contractors in SW Florida, to say we had a hectic life is a real understatement. 

We retired in 2000, moved from Fla to Okla.  We were here 3 yrs and DH came in and told me he had bought a farm. 360 A.  GOOD GRIEF!!

We have been here 7 years.  It is soooo different than our life in FLA, DH is so happy, he is always up to something.

We have goats, horses, 60 chickens and birddogs.  I never had any kind of farm animal before, but I can read, and ask questions, and I love being out here.

We have a garden this year, and are getting lovely tomatos, potatos, 
corn, squash, cucumbers.

Our kids (oops, children) thought we were nuts, and probably still do, butdon't say so as much as they did when we bought the place!! 

Having animals gives your life so much meaning.  I think it's got something to do with being able to control at least a part of your life. Not to mention the self satisfaction of having some food that you yourself produced.

My husband was raised on a farm in Iowa many years ago.  He had to get up at 4:30 am. go help milk the cows, chore, then come in and have breakfast, then get on the bus and go to school.

You should see him milk the goats, he said milking was like riding a bike you never forget how.  HA!!

Anyway, we are going to a big Bar Mitzvah in Dallas next month and while others are bragging about going to Paris, I'll be telling everyone about my goats!!

DonnaBelle


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## ohiofarmgirl

welcome to farmin'!


thats why we all have to stick together. 

for heavens sakes - they should hand out a "what to look out for" pamphlet when you start this farming thing and on the first page it should say:

Your family and well meaning friends will mock you at every turn. Then they will turn up their nose at any food you've grown. And then there will be more mocking. Followed by name calling and a certain amount of making fun of everything you do.

Until...

...you show them your $25 a week grocery bill. then its not so funny and they will all start coming around asking for advice on how you do this or that and can you help them start a garden?

If it makes you feel any better - I had someone tell me that I was "so poor I had to eat a turkey from my yard."

The punchline to this is that my 'organically raised turkeys' would sell for over $100 at a snooty in-city grocery store. 

As for the 'you're so poor' ... I retired from my corporate life when I was 38 and everything we have is paid for...

And for the critters... I had someone tell me that their 3 cats and 2 dogs were to much work. I just laughed. We have over 100 pieces of poultry, goats, pigs, AND dogs n cats. 

so you just have to laugh. 

lately i've been telling folks like this that i "feel bad for folks who dont have our life." or tell them that i dont need a vacation because everyday on the farm is like a vacation. and if that doesnt work i start quoting Proverbs. then i start ignoring them. 

hang in there baby - and get better friends!

ps Scripture says that all hard work is profitable and if thats the only reason you to do it, thats good enough.


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## patandchickens

glenolam said:
			
		

> I don't repeatedly say "Wow - you're doing nothing today but sitting by the pool day dreaming?  That must be really crazy!  I don't know how you don't drive yourself insane with all the free time you have!"


Perhaps you SHOULD say that, whenever the person says their thing, and give them a Humorous Yet Pointed Look, and change the subject... that might cut down on it remarkably 

Good luck, have fun,

Pat


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## glenolam

Thanks for making me smile and laugh.

The thing is - there's a few specific people that do this to us and they're not really our friends or aquaintances.  It's a few family members and my co-workers.  Our close friends and most of our family members get it and really enjoy coming over, but I limit my conversation with the other type of people so I don't have to get into details.  But it always goes into how chaotic our life is....I think I need new responses...

"Yes, it is hectic, but it beats having the same boring conversation again and again!"

"Oh, we're always busy.  Beats sitting around talking about how busy other people are."

"Everyone at the farm is doing well.  Luckily our animals are becoming more self sufficient so I have more time to do....what is that you do all day again?  Nothing?  Sounds like fun to me!"


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## DonnaBelle

Yep, just sit there and feel sorry for them, that's the best way to handle it!!!

Quite frankly, I feel sorry for anyone who doesn't have goats!!!

DonnaBelle


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## Mea

ohiofarmgirl said:
			
		

> welcome to farmin'!
> 
> Until...
> 
> ...you show them your $25 a week grocery bill. then its not so funny and they will all start coming around asking for advice on how you do this or that and can you help them start a garden?
> 
> If it makes you feel any better - I had someone tell me that I was "so poor I had to eat a turkey from my yard."
> 
> The punchline to this is that my 'organically raised turkeys' would sell for over $100 at a snooty in-city grocery store. .


DH and i still laugh about the time that the neighborhood children came to 'see the animals'... and when they found out that we had eggs from our chickens...milk from our goats,,, asked us  "If we were poor, cuz we didn't buy those things from the store ?? "    


  I figure we are only Poor when we go to the feed store..................


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## rusty66211

Ok here is my 5 cents worth:
I have 2 horses , one donkey , a 30 year old pony, two spanish goats, one boar goat, 25 chicken, 25 chicks , two pygmy goat babies, one boar spanish cross bottle fed baby, 5 dogs , six cats and more kittens on the way. Oh and before I forget there is also four fish and somewhere on my 5 acres you see  two boys (12and130 running around with my 2 year old grandson. At the end of this month we are getting an exchange student from spain for the school year. My husband is retired military and works full time and I am a maillady. My hubby is going overseas to work as a contractor soon. Why???? Guess what we want more land for more critters. People ask all the time how can you do it and the take a exchange student on top of it? I always say the same thing "It's a farm thing you wouldn't understand" I was born and raised in the city but I would not trade my countrylife for anything in the world I just plain and simple LOVE IT. Some people like doing nothing others like being busy I just like seeing my animals happy when they get spoiled by me. Enjoy your critters and the heck with what people say .


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## ohiofarmgirl

> "It's a farm thing you wouldn't understand"


i think you need to put that on tshirts and bumper stickers
;-)


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## rusty66211

I actually borrowed it from my husband who has a jeep and it says its a jeep thing you wouldn't understand I just think it works better for the farm lol


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## mully

Best to just put them on ignore because they will never understand and trying to explain will make you mad. Life is too short to be mad !!


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## freemotion

Throw your head back and laugh, then lean in, put your hand on his/her arm and say, right in his/her face...."You are SO funny!"  Then change the subject.  Or better yet, walk away, still laughing.

Works for me.  And those observing don't see anything snotty happening.  Which makes me laugh even harder!


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## glenolam

Awesome advice, everyone!

Now I'm thinking that I may just start really acting crazy...then people will be too afraid to ask any questions!  HA HA HA HA


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## Trail rider

"It's a farm thing you wouldn't understand"

You are sooo right.  Nothing taste as good when you set the table with food from your garden that you raised.  Reminds me of that movie Richer or Poorer when Tim Allen's corn grew, When you see all your hard work pay off, the muscles seem to hurt less.


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## ohiofarmgirl

glenolam said:
			
		

> Awesome advice, everyone!
> 
> Now I'm thinking that I may just start really acting crazy...then people will be too afraid to ask any questions!  HA HA HA HA


sure! that generally works for me!


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## TigerLilly

This is a great thread! I lived in WV as a teen & hated it because we had a pig farm. Although the pig rodeos were fun, I didn't appreciate it then. Now, I'm looking forward to keeping my goats, getting a few laying hens & some mini cattle. I wont be totally self-sufficient on my mini farm, but that grocery bill will start dropping.
I'm starting now, so when I am actually retired (in about 11 more years), I can have more time to ENJOY the life I didn't take advantage of when I was younger.
Like I told my friends, deep down I'm just a good ol' redneck country girl!


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## abooth

Thank you for starting this thread.  Somehow lately I have been feeling like I don't fit in with the people at work etc.  I only have a one acre backyard but I keep 4 sheep and several chickens.  I work overnight.  When I am at work I just can't wait for morning so I can get home and take care of the sheep.  I love just bringing them their water and raking out their house in the morning.  So I guess I am doing what I love but feeling a little awkward lately.  My dad and uncle are coming to visit in September to help me do some work on my house.  I am a little worried about their reaction.  Though my dad at least knows what I am doing here.  I made him a father's day video about the "farm".  He really liked my silkies.


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## Beekissed

Somewhat like abooth, I have 5 sheep and chickens, a couple of large gardens...nothing that would cause that type of reaction, but I still get the same kind of comments.... 

"We love driving by your house...we never know what we are gonna see!"  

"I don't know how you take care of all those animals and have any time for yourself!"

"Looks like you're trying to farm on that place!"  

"Seems like an awful lotta work to me."

First, I have my place set up so that it doesn't take "a lot of work" to keep it going smoothly.  If I had too many animals for comfort, I would definitely get rid of them....I'm not a glutton for punishment, by any means. 

Second, the time for myself IS working with the animals and gardening...I love even looking out the window at it all.  

Third, no I'm not "trying to farm" out there....I'm trying to keep an acre of grass converted to meat, using the free grass to feed a food animal or two, and stacking species to provide an optimal living environment for all.....plus, they are just darn pretty walking around on my carefully manicured lawn.  

I do feel sorry for the people who lack the imagination to create a scenario that is aesthetically pleasing, produces food, and requires little hard extended labor to achieve.  

The same people who sit staring trance-like at a box of images and sound in their living room, night after night, and think that THAT is some semblance of a life.  

glenolam, we are all with you....power to the sheeple....er..._people_!


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## tiffanyh

Lately I have been feeling the same way. I almost avoid talking about it with people, one guys at work said to "wow, your one of a kind" in regards to me showing him my new fencing I had built when he asked me what I did over the weekend. I said "nope, there are quite a few like me!".

The comments of "Wow, this must be a lot of work", I take those as a compliment that people can appreciate how much time and energy I put into making my paddock area, chicken run and aviary look great in my landscaped lot. 

But now that my kid are older, we are having more company for playdates, and even though the yard is always nicely manicured for visits, I can help but wonder if I am the crazy animal lady......


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## SDGsoap&dairy

Great thread folks.  I get sooo sick of this kind of reaction as well.  I have one person at work who has to point out on a regular basis "wow, that must be a lot of work..." Yet she buys eggs from me EVERY week.  

What's funnier to me (in a totally aggravating sort of way) is that when I told her I was cutting back from full time to part time she waited til I left the room then said to a coworker, "you know, when she got those goats I knew this would happen.  I really should have told her not to get them..."  I hadn't yet mentioned it was because I got a BETTER JOB and was transitioning out of that place!!!  The real kicker for me was her assumption that her opinion about whether or not I should get goats was of ANY consequence to me.  Please. 

I also have a family member who gushes about the fresh, organic bacon from Whole Foods yet declined to take a dozen of my just-laid-that-morning free-range eggs home with her because it's "freaky."  Uh.... ok.  Of course, this IS the same person who mockingly asked me "how can you tell your free-range birds are happier than caged hens?  It's a chicken!"  

Glad I could vent to those in the know.


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## Emmetts Dairy

Its amazing huh....how people think we didnt choose to do this??? No one forced us to be farmers!!!   LOL  I hear all the time "you shouldnt work so hard" and I say... "Its not hard work when you love it!!!"

 There has been many invitations my husband and I declined on the weekends..cuz we rather be HOME working on the farm...I love my goats and chickens, more than some people I know LOL!!  And I really enjoy their company. Their unconditional..they dont ask us ridiculous questions about our choices!!  They just love us!!!

  We truly love being self sufficient...Sometimes I dont even go to the grocery store for weeks...I have a resturant supplier I can buy bulk Flour and oats etc from...I make my own bread weekly and barley buy anything at the store. My husband made me a root cellar and I "can" almost everything in the fall..so we have alot of good stuff all winter.

  As my Dad use to say to me all the time "Idle hands are the devils workshop"  Stay busy!!!

PS I like the statement too "Its a farm thing"   Cuz it is!!! LOL


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## TigerLilly

It must be "a farm thing" - where do these people think the stuff they buy from the grocery store comes from, anyway? "Ignorance is bliss?" Sounds like we all know a bunch of blissfully ignorant people!
My friends have come around since I tend to talk more about my critters; now they want to bring their children to the 'farm' and see what it's all about. I may make a few converts along the way. I have a cousin that is into organic & farm fresh, healthy stuff, so she's ready & waiting for my pullets to start laying!
LIFE IS GOOD, DOWN ON THE FARM!


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## mabeane

I chose to do this in retirement after a long illness.  It makes some of my friends crazy!  You NEED to take it easy. haha  This was the easiest thing I could think of and keep my sanity.
Goatmama to 5 wonderful Nigies!


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## Shiloh Acres

I have to admit, some days in my life it's been the animals that keep me going. 

If they are sick, I have to focus on THEIR problems and not mine. If I'm down, they always make me laugh. If in lonely or missing someone, they are great company. And even if you don't feel like getting out of bed, you have to so you can take cate of them. 

I think they are natural stress-reducers (LOL though at rimes, natural stress-INDUCERS), and also good for enforced exercise and providing healthful products for food. 

They are good for me. . For a lot of us.


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## jodief100

We bought our farm a few years ago.  It was a dream of mine. I grew up working on my aunt's cattle and horse farm as a kid.  I almost always had chickens, even when I lived in the city.  

People ask if I like my farm.  I say I am working longer and harder than I ever have and I have never been happier.  My real friends smile.

When I got chickens when I lived on 1/4 of an acre in the city my coworkers asked if I was worried the neighbors would think I was crazy.  I said not doing something I wanted to do because of what someone else thought......that would be crazy.    

All my friends say they are heading to my house when there is a disaster.  I tell them they had better not come empty handed and be ready to work.


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## Rebbetzin

Keep this under your hat...

I think there is something terribly wrong with people who don't yearn to have a good sized piece of property, a garden, a few chickens and maybe some goats or other livestock in their yard.  How can they survive without such things in their lives? 

We ought to indeed feel sorry for those that can't understand our need to be close to our agricultural roots.

Life began in the garden.


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## Shiloh Acres

I never put it to words, but I've had the same kind of thoughts, Rebbetzin. How could you not want something like that?  I guess I don't understand the total urban types that are happy living in a high-rise apartment building and never seeing a blade of grass, much less animals other than cats, dogs, and rats. 

I couldn't live that way. I can't even say it'd be a nice place to visit. I don't think I'd want to spend ANY time in a huge city.


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## Rebbetzin

Shiloh Acres said:
			
		

> I never put it to words, but I've had the same kind of thoughts, Rebbetzin. How could you not want something like that?  I guess I don't understand the total urban types that are happy living in a high-rise apartment building and never seeing a blade of grass, much less animals other than cats, dogs, and rats.
> 
> I couldn't live that way. I can't even say it'd be a nice place to visit. I don't think I'd want to spend ANY time in a huge city.


Your post reminded me of the story of the City Mouse and the County Mouse.  Maybe it is genetic?  I believe in "Genetic Memory"


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## Shiloh Acres

Well, I dunno. My family is from the country. Farmers, hunters. Good bit of Cherokee blood. My mother moved us into the city growing up and I never liked it. It seems looking back like gray, depressing years. The bright spots were the times (thankfully very frequently) that I stayed with my grandparents. 

I can enjoy day trips to a city like Dallas or even LA. I think I'd freak if I was ever in a place like New York City or Tokyo. 

Give me some open space, clean air, sky overhead, lots of green stuff growing around me and I can breathe and be at peace. 

I guess I can't even understand the opposite point of view.


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## glenolam

What's very strange is that I have a twin sister who's the complete opposite of me.  Lives in Phoenix, AZ - right on the Scottsdale border, and I find I can't breathe when I come to visit her.  It's not because of the heat, but the city (You should see me try to drive in our cities - it's quite funny!).  When she comes home, she doesn't know what to do, even though there's plenty of things like raking out the goat barn, feeding the chickens, or just sitting back and watching everyone.  Luckily, she's NOT one of the ones who constantly obsesses about the amount of pets...err....animals we have around our house.  I think she just gets it.  She even had her 'Save the Date' wedding photo taken at my house in the winter with the cows in the background because it was so serene.

I wish there were more people around like her....


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## Roll farms

I'm a little late for this party, but I just found the thread....

I hear the same things a lot...but also get, "Good thing you don't work full time."

Oh, really?  I DON'T?

I do only work at an 'outside' job 2-4 days per week...by choice.  

But every day I am up early and up late, taking care of the farm...the animals and gardens aren't taking care of themselves...neither does the house / laundry / etc.  The feed / hay aren't self-stacking, and then there are the 'pets' with and without cages / crates to keep clean / fed.

We have neighbors that go 'camping' every weekend, and take a few full weeks off every summer to go in their big luxury camper complete w/ tv, satellite, beds, a/c, etc....to me, that's not really camping, that's going visiting and taking your hotel room w/ you.....

But I digress....often they say to us, "If you didn't have all those animals, you'd be free to go with us."

They do not 'get' that the animals ARE my getaway.  I find reasons to go to / be in the barn even when I'm caught up w/ chores....this is my  
'happy place'...


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## glenolam

But isn't it funny how it really doesn't feel like work when it's something you love to do!

I'd love to quit my 40 hr desk job for a part time gig and go full time at home.  Right now everything's a mess and I feel as though things are slipping out from under me.

Makes me feel as though I went to college for nothing....spent lots of $$ (and still paying!) and all I want to do is stay at home with the animals.


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## glenolam

Roll farms said:
			
		

> ...We have neighbors that go 'camping' every weekend, and take a few full weeks off every summer to go in their big luxury camper complete w/ tv, satellite, beds, a/c, etc....to me, that's not really camping, that's going visiting and taking your hotel room w/ you.....


Just have to say AMEN to that!

These are the people who tell you it's good you don't work full time!


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## greeneggsandham

At my last job I had this guy every week would start in about the little farm I have.  He would say "I can't believe you waste your time with stinky animals", "there are better things that you can do with your "extra" time", and loads of other crap. 
 Finally one day I was not in a good mood and this dummy started in again.  He ended his rant with "Why? why do you waste your time with raising animals".  Well I looked him straight in the eye and said "because it keeps my mind busy so I'm not thinking of more was to torture annoying people like YOU!  He never said another to me after that.


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## glenolam

AWESOME RESPONSE!


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## Beekissed

A guy asked me this past week how I found time to work full time and care for "all these animals"....I just smiled sweetly and said, "I seem to have plenty of time now that I don't have a husband."


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## ohiofarmgirl

> "Good thing you don't work full time."
> 
> Oh, really?  I DON'T?


aint that right!

i had someone visiting me and while i was entertaining them on our deck (with a twitch in my eye thinking of all the chores i was SUPPOSED to be doing) they said, "so is this all you do? sit around and watch the chickens?"

um. no. everything that is on your plate we grew or butchered ourselves.

i used to travel a lot. now i rarely go anywhere and when folks ask me if i miss my big luxury vacations i just tell them that 'everyday is a vacation for me...why would i want to go anywhere?'


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