Alaskan's Journal

[Latestarter]

Sorry Al... You seem much better now. Sure you still think of and miss him.

 

[Alaskan]

Sorry Al... You seem much better now. Sure you still think of and miss him.

Thanks.

I rather thought I wouldn't miss him as much as I am.

I am all grown up.

Nice to be able to share his memory with others.

 

[Wehner Homestead]

Thanks.

I rather thought I wouldn't miss him as much as I am.

I am all grown up.

Nice to be able to share his memory with others.

My best friend’s mom died of a sudden brain aneurysm when we were 13. It’s been 17 years and she still crosses my mind almost daily! Knowing they are around and at least just a phone call away is a lot different than no longer being able to communicate with them at all.

There’s a country song called “If Heaven Wasn’t So Far Away” by Justin Moore. It’s good for inducing a healthy cry once in awhile!

 

[greybeard]

One of the great tragedies of human existence is the lost personal history of everyday people. Celebrities, leaders, kings queens, rulers and despots, the famous and infamous get their lives written down and studied in great detail for posterity, the rest of us, not so much. Memory of us, fading with each year, lasts less than one generation, and the sad truth is, in short order, for each of us, the world will little care nor long remember we were even here at all. I'm on several different forums, of varied subject matter and I always encourage people to write about those they have recently lost, and to do so as soon as emotionally able to. Even if it is only on a board like this one.

I just start it with "Tell us more about your father"...


(you would be surprised (or not) just how really interested people are to read these)

 

[Bruce]

I agree @greybeard. Many "ordinary" people led very interesting lives. I see some obits of people who die in their late 80's or into their 90's and think "wow, I wonder how much of that their family, especially grandkids, knew".

 

[Finnie]

Thanks.

I rather thought I wouldn't miss him as much as I am.

I am all grown up.

Nice to be able to share his memory with others.

Ok, you guys are getting me to come out of lurking. Alaskan, I'm sorry you lost your dad.

My mom died unexpectedly in March. She lived in a different state, and I rarely saw her, but would talk with her on the phone once in a while. It keeps hitting me how weird it is that I can't call her and tell her this or that any more.

@greybeard , you are right. One thing I learned from my (late) father-in-law was how to listen to people and then ask them a leading question about the thing they were interested in. He could get complete strangers to open up and talk on and on about their job, hobby or interest. (Much to the dismay of the entire family that had to stand around an extra hour when it had been time to leave an activity.) But now we all get a chuckle when we remember those times and how excited Dad would get learning about maple syrup making, or whatever the subject at the time was. And I bet the person he was listening to probably never forgot him.

 

[Bruce]

My mom died unexpectedly in March. She lived in a different state, and I rarely saw her, but would talk with her on the phone once in a while. It keeps hitting me how weird it is that I can't call her and tell her this or that any more.

That is how it was when my Mom died in 2003, complications from a Rheumatoid Arthritis drug and getting the flu. Took some time to not think "I'm going to call Mom and tell her ... Oh". Doesn't mean I don't think of her fairly often though.
to you and @Alaskan 'cause I've been there and know what it is like.

 

[Pastor Dave]

The love doesn't stop because they're physically absent. I believe it remains with us and they take it with them. And these three remain; Faith, hope, and love, and the greatest is love.
I still think of things I want to tell Dad or call and tell him even after a year now. His chair still sits empty at Mom's.
I hear a gospel song he would sing or hum or whistle and my eyes and throat swell up.

 

[Alaskan]

I just start it with "Tell us more about your father"...

Well... he was a character. He was always very anti- PC, but usually very kind, and always unfailingly generous.

He would talk to the people most people ignore. So the guy handing him his meat at the meat counter at the grocery store... my dad would ask him how his family was... and MEAN it. And always listen sympathetically or with excitement to whatever the response was.

He always made me feel that I and my siblings, were his greatest joy, and most wonderful gift. He also always made it clear that he was thrilled my mom agreed to marry him.

He was super old fashioned... but even when I failed at learning Latin well enough to talk to him in Latin... he never made me feel like a failure over it.

I did finally learn all of the Roman provinces in Northern Africa... but have now forgotten. I remember asking him WHY do I have to memorize that? He answered "but what if you fall into a worm hole that transfers you across space and time, and deposits you in a random location in Northern Africa during the Roman Empire??? You will need to find your way back to Rome!" "Yes, Papa" was the only polite and acceptable answer... so memorize I did.

I also had to memorize family stories.. back as far as they go... which luckily is only about 1800. And all of the family names back to 17 something.

I had to shoot well, and he helped me to learn when I was so young he would have to hold the end of the rifle up because it was too heavy for me (I was a very scrawny kid) but I didn't have to rope.

He had never been very good at roping, but he had great stories of helping his uncle on the ranch.

One summer his uncle bought a used 2 hole outhouse. And he decided he wanted it on the far end of the ranch, so he could use it if he was out that way. (I know... odd... whatever... maybe he got it for free)

But with all the ranch land being solid rocks... wheels or a travoi were out of the question. So they had to sling it between 2 ranch horses and have the horses move in tandem all the way to the far end of the ranch. My dad said it took all day, and was about the death of them.

Then they did the same thing a different summer with a great big metal water trough. That was worse, since it was across the ranch then down into a ravine.

He remembers after the war all of the vagrants. Mostly men back from the war that couldn't for one reason or another get a job. They would knock on the house door asking for food or money. His mom would always station my dad at the door to talk to them, and make sure that they weren't tempted to steal anything, while she fixed them a lunch. She always made them a lunch, usually with a big meat filled sandwich.

My dad while in high school worked for Dr. Denton Cooley the guy who figured out how to do heart transplants. My dad loved that. But he was most proud of the fact that he got to be deputy sheriff for a good number of years. He was all kinds of proud of that shiny metal star and was forever showing it off!

Talking of proud.. he was very proud to be a Texian. 6th generation. Mexican, and Texian, but not American. He wasn't anti-American... he just thought Texas was better.

On letters that he addressed to Texas while traveling overseas, he would write TEXAS in huge letters, and USA in tiny letters underneath the huge TEXAS.

We had to schedule longer times to get past the passport people when traveling to wherever. Because when asked "Country of origin?" He always answered "Texas!" When they said "but isn't that part of the US?" He would answer, with this hugely theatrical hang dog face "Sadly, you are correct sir."

 

[Bruce]

Lovely Al!!!! Sounds like he was quite the character and worth knowing.

Sure hope that worm hole doesn't get you though or you would be lost!