I got called yesterday around 10:30 from my dad and he asked me to come help him with my mom so she could go to the hospital cause he was worried about her. After i got there mom refused to go, so dad called hospice. The lady that came out was super nice. They are sending a bed today for mom, and they left us with morphine and lorzapam for mom yesterday. They didnt get there until about 5pm gave her morphine at around 6pm and by 7pm she was sleeping deeply which I'm glad about. She has been in so much pain, i'm glad it helped. Working with medical before, i know what the morphine means and I know my mom knows too.
My mom is a bit confused but she is still herself. I found out yesterday the stupid doctor took her off the steroid she was on...that was keeping the swelling in her brain down. He said it wasnt good for her bones...i was like are you f*ing kidding...yes thats the big concern atm I dont know when he took her off of them, i only know it was between Easter and when she fell down so i am wondering if that is related to her confusion and seemingly out of no where rapid decline. I'm going to see if hospice will put her back on the steroid at least until my brother can get her in a few days so mom can say her goodbyes still being mom. I know it won't extend her life but I know she wants to see my brother who she hasnt seen in almost 2yrs now. I'm just hoping for a bit more mental clarity for her for a bit.
Realistically her life expectancy is currently 2-3 weeks, the 3 weeks is being optimistic. My goal is just for my brother to get her to see my mom when she is still alert and awake/able to speak. He is going to be shocked last time he saw our mom she weighed about 175, at her last doctor visit right before Easter she was down to 147 and she has lost more weight since then. She also has moonface from the steroids. So he is in for a bit of a shock.
Mom has totally lost her appetite, she says nothing tastes good and other things she can't seem to keep down. Dad has been making her protein drinks(ensure type) mixed with heavy cream just for the calories the last few days but i dont know how much longer she will be able to drink those either. It's a terrible situation, do you try to keep calories in her and try to keep her more aware, the calories will prolong her suffering and being more aware will be more stressful but not feeding her something feels like neglecting her and we dont want her to just starve to death, we also want her to be able to say her last goodbyes. It's like we just are not sure what decisions are helping her or hurting her and what ones she would want at this point.
I’m so sorry. I’ve held many hands as they slipped away and helped many families through the decision making process at the end of life. My heart breaks for you!