Misfitmorgan's Journal - That Summer Dust

[CntryBoy777]

Sure glad to hear your Mom is at least hearing ya, sometimes it takes a bit for things to be accepted...
I really like those hereford pigs, I'd never seen any like that before. Those will be interesting to keep up with and watch. Hope the shears hold up and peel the fiber off your herd...

 

[Baymule]

That is some good news about your mom! I am so relieved and I know you are. Go mom!

Love the pigs!!! They are gorgeous! If I raised breeding stock, Herefords would be at the top of my list.

 

[Bruce]

My mom texted me this morning to ask if our pigs were missing (thank goodness they're not), on her way to work there was a big pig walking up the road.... Lol! Wonder who's missing a pig?

@Latestarter but I don't think his pig made it all the way up th NH!

On your Mom. You need to tell her your feelings. A real sit down, daughter/mother talk from your heart. At the rate she is going, she won't be here much longer and it will always nag at you that maybe you should have spoke up. Yes, respect her wishes, but she needs to know that her decision isn't only all about her. Her decision impacts her entire family and you need to respectfully tell her so.

My heart goes out to you because you are trying so hard to do what your Mom wants, even though you don't agree with her choice. At the same time, you don't want to push her into something she doesn't want to do, for then you will be the "bad guy". But if you do nothing and she dies, you will always wonder if maybe it would have turned out differently if you had spoken up. Choose your words carefully, speak with love, tell her your fear of losing her and make sure that she knows she has your support, no matter what her choice. This is weighing heavy on you and you need to speak your feelings or this will be a burden you bear for the rest of your life. You don't want to look back and wonder "what if".

She thinks the treatment is going to kill her. The cancer will kill her. Her fear of the treatment is greater than her fear of dying. Maybe you can help her to see that she has nothing to lose by trying.

Well said @Baymule

Harsh as this sounds, she needn't worry whether she can work while on Chemo because if she doesn't go for the heavy duty treatment (given her current state and rapid progression) she won't be working anyway. REALLY GLAD to read the further post that she is going to do chemo. 100% guarantee fix? Nope, but the odds are WAY better than doing nothing and hoping it will go away. There are a whole lot of breast cancer survivors out there, she probably knows a few that never mentioned it to her.

to you and your family @misfitmorgan

 

[NH homesteader]

I'm happy to hear your mom reconsidered as well. Thanks for the pig info! Love the Hereford colors!!

 

[misfitmorgan]

Sure glad to hear your Mom is at least hearing ya, sometimes it takes a bit for things to be accepted...
I really like those hereford pigs, I'd never seen any like that before. Those will be interesting to keep up with and watch. Hope the shears hold up and peel the fiber off your herd...

Makes me feel a bit better.
I'm hoping the hsears will work well, i have heard a few people say they had to send the combs and cutters off to get sharpened....off the brand new shears before they could use them so i hope that isnt the case but if it is i did order an exactly comb and two cuters which should come sharp.

That is some good news about your mom! I am so relieved and I know you are. Go mom!

Love the pigs!!! They are gorgeous! If I raised breeding stock, Herefords would be at the top of my list.

Hopefully once she actually starts the chemo she wont be so scared about it and everything will go well for her....as well as chemo does anyhow.

@Latestarter but I don't think his pig made it all the way up th NH!


Well said @Baymule

Harsh as this sounds, she needn't worry whether she can work while on Chemo because if she doesn't go for the heavy duty treatment (given her current state and rapid progression) she won't be working anyway. REALLY GLAD to read the further post that she is going to do chemo. 100% guarantee fix? Nope, but the odds are WAY better than doing nothing and hoping it will go away. There are a whole lot of breast cancer survivors out there, she probably knows a few that never mentioned it to her.

to you and your family @misfitmorgan

I know thats what i tried to bring up to her, her not working concern was for her health insurance. She can take long term disability but that only lasts so long. My dad is suppose to retire on June 1st and his work won't let him stay on longer even with just finding out about mom's cancer...so she cant use his insurance. They would get 18 months of cobra if it came down to it and there are other insurance options. She has been talking to a lot breast cancer survivors, the cancer center here put her in touch with a few that have recently gone through treatment. They also have it arranged to have two people who just finished treatment in the past month to talk to my mom, one that had a really good chemo experience and one that had a really bad one but survived....so she can see both sides.

I'm happy to hear your mom reconsidered as well. Thanks for the pig info! Love the Hereford colors!!

No Problem!

For the headgate it looks like i am looking at a 3" gap...i guess if that isnt big enough i will just notch the board later. The stand dimensions are 20"W x 48"L x 17H"....the headgate portion is approx 48" tall atm but i might end up chopping that down once i see how the goats fit on it.

The plan for the fitting stand is to make it on an angle. Premier1 hasnt even shipped my order yet I also ordered some more electric netting, the livestock should be pleased but now DH says he thinks we need a new battery for the solar powered fencer

 

[greybeard]

MisfitMorgan...where to start...

Been thru this with my identical twin brother now since July 2015. It ain't fun.
2 different brain surgeries, 3 rounds of chemo--one of them on a port and pump for weeks, 3 rounds of radiation and currently taking rad every day for 13 straight days for yet another 2 tumors in his cerebellum. He has a good surgeon and he said "He handles surgery well and I can go in and get those 2 as well, but let's try radiation first and if that works, we'll follow up with chemo. If the radiation doesn't do the trick, I'll go in there and cut them out, then follow with chemo".

One of his chemos for esophagus was $14,000 per treatment, but the drug company picked the tab up on it. It worked.

He never missed work except for when he was recovering from brain surgery. Lost his hair, hated to eat, pooped every 15 minutes and was weak from the chemo, now has spots on left lung and one in his spleen but he's still in the fight. I know he's tired of being sick and has told me so, and I'm not sure he will go the chemo route again. I've urged him each time to do what the docs want, but this time, I'm good with whatever he decides for quality of life no matter how much it is going to hurt me.

He and I are close, and I cannot adequately express how close. We know each other better and longer than anyone we have known, plus the 9 months in womb--identical means we were split from the same zygote. Worked together for decades, in Vietnam together, even shared a GF when we were young--she couldn't tell us apart) Same personalities, same physical appearance, same likes and dislikes. When he had his last physical episode with latest brain tumor, (they thought it was a stroke) I knew something had happened even before I got the call (He's in Arkansas). We just know. He and I have burned up US 59 going back and forth checking on each other for nearly 2 years now, driving straight thru the night each time for 8 hrs. (I have heart issues)

I am not much on alternative medicine at all. I always think of Steve Jobs(Apple) and one of the last interviews Steve Jobs gave, he expressed regret for seeking alternative care for his pancreatic cancer instead of the more accepted treatments.

In October 2003, Jobs was diagnosed with cancer.[114] In mid-2004, he announced to his employees that he had a cancerous tumor in his pancreas.[115] The prognosis for pancreatic cancer is usually very poor;[116] Jobs stated that he had a rare, much less aggressive type, known as islet cell neuroendocrine tumor.[115]

Despite his diagnosis, Jobs resisted his doctors' recommendations for medical intervention for nine months,[117] instead relying on a pseudo-medicine diet to try natural healing to thwart the disease. According to Harvard researcher Ramzi Amri, his choice of alternative treatment "led to an unnecessarily early death".[114] Cancer researcher and alternative medicine critic David Gorski disagreed with Amri's assessment, saying, "My best guess was that Jobs probably only modestly decreased his chances of survival, if that."[118] Barrie R. Cassileth, the chief of Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center's integrative medicine department,[119] said, "Jobs's faith in alternative medicine likely cost him his life.... He had the only kind of pancreatic cancer that is treatable and curable.... He essentially committed suicide."[120] According to Jobs's biographer, Walter Isaacson, "for nine months he refused to undergo surgery for his pancreatic cancer – a decision he later regretted as his health declined".[121] "Instead, he tried a vegan diet, acupuncture, herbal remedies, and other treatments he found online, and even consulted a psychic. He was also influenced by a doctor who ran a clinic that advised juice fasts, bowel cleansings and other unproven approaches, before finally having surgery in July 2004."[122] He eventually underwent a pancreaticoduodenectomy (or "Whipple procedure") in July 2004, that appeared to remove the tumor successfully

I wish you and your family the best and will pray for all of you.

 

[misfitmorgan]

MisfitMorgan...where to start...

Been thru this with my identical twin brother now since July 2015. It ain't fun.
2 different brain surgeries, 3 rounds of chemo--one of them on a port and pump for weeks, 3 rounds of radiation and currently taking rad every day for 13 straight days for yet another 2 tumors in his cerebellum. He has a good surgeon and he said "He handles surgery well and I can go in and get those 2 as well, but let's try radiation first and if that works, we'll follow up with chemo. If the radiation doesn't do the trick, I'll go in there and cut them out, then follow with chemo".

One of his chemos for esophagus was $14,000 per treatment, but the drug company picked the tab up on it. It worked.

He never missed work except for when he was recovering from brain surgery. Lost his hair, hated to eat, pooped every 15 minutes and was weak from the chemo, now has spots on left lung and one in his spleen but he's still in the fight. I know he's tired of being sick and has told me so, and I'm not sure he will go the chemo route again. I've urged him each time to do what the docs want, but this time, I'm good with whatever he decides for quality of life no matter how much it is going to hurt me.

He and I are close, and I cannot adequately express how close. We know each other better and longer than anyone we have known, plus the 9 months in womb--identical means we were split from the same zygote. Worked together for decades, in Vietnam together, even shared a GF when we were young--she couldn't tell us apart) Same personalities, same physical appearance, same likes and dislikes. When he had his last physical episode with latest brain tumor, (they thought it was a stroke) I knew something had happened even before I got the call (He's in Arkansas). We just know. He and I have burned up US 59 going back and forth checking on each other for nearly 2 years now, driving straight thru the night each time for 8 hrs. (I have heart issues)

I am not much on alternative medicine at all. I always think of Steve Jobs(Apple) and one of the last interviews Steve Jobs gave, he expressed regret for seeking alternative care for his pancreatic cancer instead of the more accepted treatments.



I wish you and your family the best and will pray for all of you.

Thank you so much @greybeard. I lost my brother in January so i know a bit of how you would feel to lose your brother, though mine isnt my twin. We shared a couple girl friends.....i know So far losing him was thee most painful thing in my life and i can't imagine losing my mother so soon after him, it makes me just wanna give up on life but i'm to stubborn to do that. So for now i will go with mom to all of her appointments that she wants me at and go with her for her chemo and anything else she needs, what happens will happen and there isnt much else i can do. I find i am focusing a lot on getting things done around the farm that i was putting off, focusing on finding a new farm and saving money for the down payment. Hopefully everything goes well but so far in 2017 a lot has gone wrong.

 

[Latestarter]

 

[Hens and Roos]

continued prayers for you and your family

 

[Bruce]

She has been talking to a lot breast cancer survivors, the cancer center here put her in touch with a few that have recently gone through treatment. They also have it arranged to have two people who just finished treatment in the past month to talk to my mom, one that had a really good chemo experience and one that had a really bad one but survived....so she can see both sides.

Love that cancer center. Stupid to sugar coat and only bring in "IT WENT GREAT!!" people. Reality is what it is and I'd rather have all the info so I'm somewhat prepared wherever I land in that spectrum.