rachels.haven's Journal

[Baymule]

New fence is fantastic! That is a big deal, getting good fence up.

3 boys. Saved the best for last? Like if you had Shaun first, you would have had a hysterectomy?

 

[rachels.haven]

Lol, well we're definitely done, or Mark and I are going to need that straight jacket.
Shaun's actually better than the first. #1 had violent, hours long tantrums as a toddler and a mean streak he's had to learn to curb, and he does a good job. Number two was an accident/surprise (because if all kids were like #1 I wasn't having anymore) but #2 also has zero malice for anyone and no temper and due to that we discovered we "wanted" him very quickly. He was always into everything more intensely than Shaun and always wanted to take things apart to figure out how they work but he also has zero survival drive and #1 went through a phase where he constantly wanted to dispatch his brother and would not be distracted so together 1&2 were almost impossible. Shaun, on the other hand has a mild temper, some survival drive (not tons, but if he believes you he'll not do the dangerous thing unlike #2 at his age), and some desire to figure out how everything works. Yesterday he flipped his baby tub over and used the large partially rolled lip to channel water out onto the floor as it came out of the faucet. He also likes to connect and build tp tube "pipes" to pipe water out if I'm not watching, and watering cans are banned objects. Everything he did was within character. The destructiveness was off the charts though and I'm pretty sure all he got out of it was that Daddy got mad, which made him cry, ask for dinner, then put himself to bed in a depressed heap. He's going to have to stew for a while to figure it out and I'm going to have to show him the basement. Daddy was too mad to do that last night. (The basement is still torn up from the pipe leak though so it's not as bad for us as it could be. We're ripping up the floor anyway)

Last time we saw my mother in law she told us that DH was so bad and into everything he regularly drove her to tears...so that's probably where all this comes from. He had at least one poison control/hospital incident on his record. We've done okay in that respect so far, but some days when Shaun is particularly heckbent on trouble all I do is sit and watch this kid like a crazy or lazy person and dishes and laundry do not get done.
I was not like this as a kid. We got beat a lot and the parents had more of us every 2 years so we would have offed ourselves due to lack of supervision and still probably got the belt or paddle on the way out if we were like my boys. I'd rather wreck my sanity than have that relationship with my kids though (my parents are better friends than parents, parenting is hard).
My boys are happy kids. Childhood is short, and then it will just be Mark and I again.

 

[farmerjan]

Don't think that childhood is short enough, in your case.......

All I can say is God bless you... because I cannot imagine... There were 4 of us, 3 close together, born within 4 years) and we got the belt a few times; we played together, I was the unofficial babysitter being the oldest. We did stuff I know... but never to the point of such destructiveness... and my son was an only child but he learned early on that to tear something up was just not allowed... I would have sent him to an orphanage if he had done what your kids have done... You must have the patience of Job... how do you take care of the animals the way you manage, especially milking and all... with having to be a warden at all times with the human kids????????

 

[Baymule]

I’d say you already have earned your place in Heaven. Your spot is reserved, just don’t be in a hurry to get there.