Latestarter's ramblings/musings/gripes and grumbles.

[Hens and Roos]

Thanks again everyone for the positive thoughts and well wishes. OK, daughter was held hostage until the neurologist could get by to see her. Finally happened around 4-4:30. She is now on another med in addition to what she was on before. No idea what or why or intended purpose. You know docs today... "give em another pill". So I took her by her place and escorted her up to her apt to get her stuff and as you can see, we are now home. She'll be with me for the next 4 days. Her dog was pretty happy to see her. Gotta figure something for dinner... Thinking kielbasa and mac & cheese... We did swing in and get a spicy chicken sandwich from mickey "D"s on the way home... we were both hungry, but that won't cut it for dinner. I am officially tired.

We've learned to ask lots of questions of the doctors/hospital/rehab on all matters pertaining to my dad(he doesn't remember the information given to him) and the medications they are having him take to control his seizures. My DH is awesome in making sure my mom understands since she has to make health decisions for my dad.

 

[JACB Dorper]

Heel low:

Uhmmm...yeh, on your journey and pursuit of happiness...I have a few rooles...not hard and fast but a few guiding "lights" before you meet your lighted Maker at that end of that tunnel, eh.

A worthy person deserves to be happy...not at all costs but I figure until a person is on the path (and a brambly one it be) towards nirvana ... self-happiness (happiness is right behind your eyes, eh...that is what MY Hero says), you are a devote slave to the challenges of the responsibilities you (by your own free will) have chosen to take on. Key word is CHOSEN... Be generous where you may be generous...give what you can afford to lose...take care of YOURSELF first so you have the ability to give freely without compromising YOURSELF. Stay healthy, be miserly safe and care for yourself carefully so you are just as capable to help others as you are able to care for yourself.

Selfish, perhaps but if each and every ONE of us did that...heck past emergencies (and yes, health be one like accidents that were not soundly preventable, and such), there sure would be alot of stand up for themselves persons with the ability to HELP the World for those in dire need of decent care. It is not our duty to bear the entire weight of the world and all its issues. Good GACK Mun...we all deserve ME time and such...how can we be ourselves without taking care of ourselves so that we may be all we can be? A person that cares about us, would see instantly that to sacrifice YOUR DREAMS is far too much to ask of any human. How dare someone drag you down, ruin your otherwise sound judgments and decisions, make you change your life to accommodate them. I know love but I also know about abuse of generosity of character. So many givers out numbered by takers, eh.

When we join with another and we have progeny and accept that "family" state along with her kids, his kids and the kids his and her made plus pets and livestock and other living entities...I would expect a reasonable amount of time to have to freely devote to being responsible FOR that entity(ies) is 25 or so years per human child. After that grace period...I am hard core and strict in that myself, ME...that I deserve to make decisions about MY own destiny and pursue them without the burden of "oops...baby needs burping," etc. Get me?

I am not a practising religious person of any faith...but in Hinduism...there is suppose to be four stages of life for a man...I find answers often in showing interest in what cultures dictate people are suppose to be doing with their lives...

http://hinduism.about.com/od/basics/p/fourstages.htm

The First Ashrama - "Brahmacharya" or the Student Stage

• The Second Ashrama - "Grihastha" or the Householder Stage

• The Third Ashrama - "Vanaprastha" or the Hermit Stage

• The Fourth Ashrama - "Sannyasa" or the Wandering Ascetic Stage

There is a time for all things...like those verses about time to sow, time to harvest and all that jazz. Is it your destiny to never achieve the goals you set for yourself?

There comes a time one would hope where we still have our own health and resources to do the things that really matter to us as a person (you owe yourself first and foremost to be happy)...I so wish (and especially seen in the men of the family) that the mundane making of a living to PROVIDE for a family would lighten up. Humans are so capable of GREAT greatness and I don't mean on their tombstone, it reads; "kept a clean household," "provided for the brats well"...

Keeping in mind historically all those great persons that did things they are remembered for. Most often said in the case of musicians...it was at the expense of a normal life, a normal family and the burden created by being the go to guy in a family. A musician is given a gift of torment that can make them literally burst inside if they do not spew out that talent....on the road, pursue of fame at the expense of what some would see as a burden of a family perhaps...spewing out that music before it gobbles them up. Something like that, eh. Kinda a yin and yang thingmabobby.

I mean I know looking after your family IS an honest greatness--that's what my man does...but so is being happy inside and for you alone too. My Hero gets time now to restore vintage vehicles...he's built me my playground and it is his time to pursue his hobbies in trucks and guitars.

To pursue something well, some things have to go by the way side and that focus towards that goal has to take precedent... I am truly OK with you being there for family...so long as you also are there for yourself and that YOUR true happiness trail is still on track and happening.

You my dear man are in the golden era of your life. There is a time for us all and right now, you have a window of time to get your sorry butt to where you will prosper and thrive...the golden years where you get to play on your own dirt, make your inner self happy, and just beam with the silliness of a child in their personal sandbox. This is a stern talking to you about YOU and your rights to be happy...useless otherwise...to everyone and YOU.

I personally cannot imagine at my age and in physical shape starting from scratch. Rick and I have discussed if we lost it all by back luck/chance, to the ongoing threats we have here of fire, flood, tornado...the things not quite in our control. Would we begin again or drop it all like a shed snake skin and try to take up a new adventure...maybe buy that old fishing boat to remodel & cruise up and down the WEsT Coast...being mobile gypsies with a box of dirt for a herb garden (gotta season our daily catch, eh) and our three dogs for company. A total different life that we pondered before we sunk our foundations here in Pear-A-Dice.

Heaven help anyone that dares throw sand in the box...make you tear up and tear up your well laid plans (of mice and men, eh).

There is a sweetness and a generosity to your soul but in that concept first and foremost...to thine own self be true. Your charity begins at home and of anyone, YOU DESERVE A HOME WHERE YOU ARE HAPPIEST. When Poppa's happy, everyone is happy--gender neutral that one should be!

I cannot read your "journal" of your journey without intervening and saying that you are useless to all that know you if you are not transitioning to the place where you figure that you will be happiest.

When us "helpers" give, we give of ourselves and we must keep in mind that to give, you have to have something to give and something left in reserves behind for you too so that you may sustain yourself. There is simply NO other person in the wings to save our own butts...to do our chores (which we took on knowing our duty of care was for the life time of those beasties and birdies), I have no saving grace to come swinging in like Tarzan to beat his chest and proclaim..."Go move your son, I got this covered"...Nope...to do EXTRAS for others we have to have those resources free and clear to give away. If you have nothing left over, you have nothing to give out either. Otherwise we are mortgaging our own reserves and taxing our own responsibilities. Do you hear me?

​

So to me, give what you are able to give without compromising YOU (do not hurt yourself to help others)...you want to sell your current patch and go to a new spot...get on it before time runs out for you. Your time, your energies, your dreams...all manageable without being sabotaged because someone ELSE requires your assistance. There is a never ending volley of takers my giver man...willing to take until you bleed from the eye balls. Vivid enough for you to SEE with true conviction? The most important component in YOUR life is YOU...care for it well and make sure you devote as much effort to your pursuit of happiness as you would to another...being that you have it to give away, then do, otherwise the tough love scenario comes to play.

Got two coats, only need one...then be generous to give one coat away...but when you are shivering in that alleyway yourself because you could not afford to give the shirt off your own back away...then you divert resources that others would need. I don't see how that balances out...retired bean counter that I be. To take from Joe to give to Jane only to have John have to step up and give Joe charity. What for? Vicious circle of waste but that would be me and my clinical & analytical view past the family ties that bind.

Give, but not at your expense or demise...hear me? You deserve better treatment, so step up Mun...get on with getting that plot you deserve to be happy on. Care for others but how much literally are you expected to give of yourself before your worthy dreams towards self-happiness all go POOF?

Hugs...

Doggone & Chicken UP!

Tara Lee Higgins
Higgins Rat Ranch Conservation Farm, Alberta, Canada

 

[Latestarter]

Thanks Tara Sure do love it when you pull out the soap box and give a down to earth lip smacking! Perfect sense, of course. Yup, yup... I know, gotta take care of the source in order for/before overflow to others. I don't give more than I can. It'll work out in the end (or so they say), and steps are being taken. Thanks for the boost! Hope you and all of yours are well up there in the north country. Thanks!

 

[Bruce]

I think one of the hardest things (other than actual medical issue) for your daughter is one that affects us all, the need for medical insurance one can afford. Hard to switch locations/jobs.

That said, how about: Is the place you are looking at within reasonable driving distance of where she could get a job? You, being retired, could choose to live where you want, she could live with you and you could be her chauffeur to and from work. Yeah, a royal PITA but you don't have time constraints and wouldn't be "trapped" where you are now. I know, off the wall but ...

And yes, accounting that she can do maybe even at home seems a good choice. Or paycheck 'creation'. Seems a lot of really small businesses farm that out rather than doing it themselves. I have no idea what it takes to get that up and running, maybe just a computer and printer and specific software?

 

[Baymule]

Not far from Tyler......
http://www.landsoftexas.com/property/13856-CR-353-Winona-Texas-75792/3346511

http://www.landsoftexas.com/Smith-County-TX/all-land/under-275000/5-30-acres/page-2/

a little farther out, Wood County

http://www.landsoftexas.com/property/1142-CR-2360-Alba-Texas-75410/3312362

http://www.landsoftexas.com/property/1034-County-Road-3144-Quitman-Texas-75783/3287887

http://www.landsoftexas.com/property/2310-C-R-2330-Mineola-Texas-75773/3280380

 

[Baymule]

I know you want to go be some kind of hermit on the dead end of a deer trail, back up against thousands of acres of National Forest, BUT....... if there was a SHTF situation, being in a good community would be far more valuable than being out in the middle of nowhere by yourself. Your daughter could get a job in Tyler, it is a large enough town to have some good jobs, and there are some nice areas in town. You could buy a place on the outskirts of civilization and you both could be happy. trying real hard here to get you to Texas.....how am I doing?

right around the corner from me....
http://www.boborealty.com/search/La...-FOR-SALE-IN-SMITH-COUNTY-NEAR-LINDALE/924453
slap you a mobile home on it and move in

 

[sadieml]

@Baymule - Those are some awesome properties you've found! Kinda makes me wish WE were in the market. @Southern by choice needs to enlist you to search for that perfect spot for them! lol @Latestarter shouldn't have any trouble at all getting to Texas with you on the job. And Joe, you definitely deserve to move toward your dream. If that's TX, then "head 'em up and move 'em out"! Life is just too short, and you've already started-up late (kinda like us). I'm just sayin' ...

 

[babsbag]

If you daughter was trained as a medical transcriber perhaps her going back to school and being a medical coder would work. There is some good money in it and many of them can be work from home jobs. Sounds like she has the education and the smarts to be whatever she wants to be. My son blames his indecision on me...when growing up I told him he could be whatever he wanted to be...and he believed me so now he has too many options.

Actually he works for the National Park Service in their HR dept. right now, but he was a ranger and decided he wanted to learn the other side of the job. He is talking about law school though.

I think Baymule has some good ideas for you.

 

[Ferguson K]

You know, there's a gorgeous property up the road from us. I should find the link. We have been eyeballing it but can't afford it at this point in our lives.

 

[Baymule]

You know, there's a gorgeous property up the road from us. I should find the link. We have been eyeballing it but can't afford it at this point in our lives.

Go find that link! We gotta get @Latestarter moving!